More! Everywhere we look we are faced with a culture of "more". People want more of our time, more of our resources, and basically more of us. And we willingly attempt to make it happen daily...doing more than we have time to do, giving more than we have to give and ending up feeling less productive and further from where we want to be at the end of the day.
1. Say no to what you can! We don't HAVE to do it all! Eliminate the things you CAN.
2. Stop just doing MORE. Start doing more of what you're GOOD at. Focus you're energies on the things you rock at! If someone asked me to re wire their house, I probably could google a few things and figure it out....that doesn't mean that I SHOULD. Focus where you are most effective!
3. Do more of what makes you better! In number two I said to do more of what you're good at. Guess what's better than good? Great! Use a bit of the time you were wasting in the wrong areas to enhance what you're already good at and become great!
Say no when you can,
do more of what you're good at,
and do more of what makes you better!
Today's not going to kick its own ass. Let's do this!
After the tragic loss of my parents, grandparents, siblings, and the murder of a close friend, I had a decision to make... Would I let my own thoughts of fear, uncertainty, and anger over their losses consume me and fill me with negativity? Or would I find a way to pull the positivity out of even the biggest tragedy?
Through my personal journey of pain, loss, and uncertainty I have taught, motivated, and inspired others to live their lives on a whole new level. I have lead others to push through their past, look past their current situations, and help them to use their current situations to achieve the happiness in life that they deserve! And the basis of all of it? Positivity! How can we be more positive? Here's a few key points that I use everyday to help others extract the positivity form every situation they encounter. I call this concept..DECIDE....TO BE....DIFFERENT.
-DECIDE! Positivity is a choice! This is the first step in being more positive! We need to make the decision that not only do we WANT to be more positive, but that we will make every effort to put it into action. No one can decide for you. You have to own it! Making the decision to be a purveyor of positivity is one that will effect every area of not only your life, but also the lives of those around you.
-Choose TO BE a positive influence! This is how we put our desire for positivity into action. When you make the cognizant effort to add positivity to someone else's life, it will naturally make you feel more positive about yourself! Every day we encounter a lot of people. Whether that be online, in person, or on the phone. Are we really taking advantage of every encounter we have? Are we extracting every bit of knowledge we can from each person we meet? Are we adding value to the life of every person we come in contact with? The best way to add value is positivity.
- DIFFERENT. In our society right now, negativity is the norm. How sad is that? Think about it though...in the news, in the media, Facebook, Twitter, etc. What are the trends? The stories and hot topics everyone are talking about are over the top negative! No matter the content, they are still presented in a way that seem to have a negative connotation. So why not be different? We are in an age where different is cool. Where if you can stand out against the grain you immediately have a platform to share from. Let's use that platform to breed positivity! We talk about love, serving others, and acceptance like we want to achieve it, but we treat it as if it's a pink unicorn that we will never find. The unicorn is right there! In the mirror. WE have to be the love we want to find in the world.
Choose to be different! Choose to live a life of positivity!
Emotions are the color in which we paint our personality. Having the CHOICE of what colors we paint ourselves is a choice I took for granted, until the day that choice was taken from me. I have experienced loss in my life that many have not had to endure. I have suffered the death of both parents, all my grandparents, all my siblings, and even the tragic murder of my best friend. After years of not dealing with this grief I developed severe anxiety. I didn't even realize it was anxiety until I was taken to hospital after experiencing chest pains which I thought was the on set of a heart attack. After a full examination I was told that what I was experiencing was an anxiety or panic attack. I have always been a very emotionally colorful person...always quick to make everyone laugh, full of life and excitement, very animated and loud. Through the death of my friends and family I also had my share of the opposite end of the color spectrum, with sadness, grief, and anger. To combat the anxiety I was prescribed an anxiety medication. The medication would soon rob me of all "color" or choice in my emotions. I took my wife and children on vacation to try to relax, clear my head, and get a grip on my anxiety issues. I remember watching my wife and kids playing in the pool, seeing them laughing and having fun. This is a sight that should evoke emotion in anyone, but somehow it didn't. I was unable to feel. The medication had robbed me of my ability to be happy or even sad. I simply felt unexplainably neutral. I couldn't be anything but neutral. At that moment I made the decision that I was no longer on anxiety medication, and that I would find a better way to cope. I began to do my own research on the effects of anxiety and depression, and put all my effort into healing...not just for myself, but for my wife and children. My healing process taught me just that...it is a PROCESS. And that process, as hard as it was at times was healthier for me and my family than any medication. I am now a motivational speaker, life coach, and writer, and I can't imagine living my life without my emotions! My ups, my downs, and all the emotions that make me ....ME! Painting in color is so much more enjoyable than using a palette of gray.
The human body would look pretty strange if it were made completely of hands wouldn't it? Not to mention it would probably be completely useless functionally. It takes multiple unique parts working independently of each other, yet in distinct harmony and fluidity to make our bodies function as they do. Why then, do we ignore this theory in life?
We've all heard the same thing time and time again about love, equality, and the value of others, yet daily we still see the proof of hate and a stubborn unwillingness to listen to those outside of our typical circle of influence.
In the past three years of my journey I have had the opportunity to meet some amazing people, and this has caused me to take a good hard look at how I have silently judged, blocked out, and ignored others in the past. Our circle of influence can have the dangerous side effect of teaching us that those outside the circle are wrong, confused, or even unable to teach us anything of value.
One of the most powerful examples of this was found in my encounters with those outside of my personal spiritual beliefs. I really don't like the idea of putting a broad label on my personal belief, but if I must, then I am a " Christian". Now before you get angry and think I am "denying Christ" by not wanting to be called a Christian or anything like that let me explain. There are millions of Christian churches in the world, who all call themselves Christians. For me to think for a second that all of our personal beliefs line up 100% is absurd. That being said I believe it's dangerous to be "labeled". My spiritual journey is personal and special to me, and I don't want the stigma that goes along with the "labels" our society places on religions to tarnish something I hold so dear. When we become part of something so large and powerful as one of these labels it's very easy to be influenced by the voice of the group and not our own. Due to the "my way or the highway" compliance agreement that many of these labels are clothed in, it teaches those under those teachings that we shouldn't value the opinion of those outside of the circle. In the past three years I have learned some amazing truths from Buddhists, Agnostics, Atheists, and many others that I once may not have taken the time to learn from. Does this mean that I have denied my beliefs and followed theirs? Nope. It means I have finally become aware to the reality that we all have a lot to learn, and the answers to a lot of the hard questions might be found OUTSIDE of our circle of influence.
The same can be said of any circle... Working moms, stay at home moms, heterosexuals, homosexuals, democrats, republicans, and so many more. We talk about love, serving others, and acceptance like we want to achieve it, but we treat it as if it's a pink unicorn that we will never find. The unicorn is right there! In the mirror. WE have to be the love we want to find in the world. Think long and hard about what truth you can teach. Think even longer and harder about what truths you can learn, and from whom you can be taught.
Every day we encounter a lot of people. Whether that be online, in person, or on the phone. Are we really taking advantage of every encounter we have? Are we extracting every bit of knowledge we can from each person we meet? Are we adding value to the life of every person we come in contact with?
We spend countless hours trying to learn. Researching online, taking classes, podcasting, reading, and more just trying to soak up as much knowledge as we can. After all knowledge is power, right? How much knowledge are we missing out on by just not paying attention? Sometimes we can learn things in a chance encounter that we never could anywhere else.
Every person you meet today I want you to ask yourself two questions. How can I add value to this person's life? What can I learn from this person?
If we honestly take the time to really pay attention to each person we meet and make a cognizant effort to add value to their life, it will truly enrich those relationships and give us something real to build on. We all have some real truths in our life that we can share. Rarely spoken bits of knowledge that have helped mold our personalities and way of being.
We all have something we can share and teach, and more important we all have a lot to learn!